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What is the difference between a person asleep and a person awake?
With some people it's hard to tell the difference.
What is the famous last word in surgery?
"Ouch!"
What is the healthiest kind of water?
Well water.
What is the perfect cure for dandruff?
Baldness.
What is worse than a centipede with sore feet?
A giraffe with a sore throat.
What is worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
A turtle with claustrophobia.
What is worse than a turtle with claustrophobia?
An elephant with hay fever.
What kind of animal needs oiling?
A mouse. It squeaks.
What kind of television program tells you who just broke an arm or leg?
A newscast.
What means of transportation gives people colds?
A choo-choo train.
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