Doctor, health, medical & hospital riddles

Doctor, Health, & Medical Riddles

What did the doctor say to the patient when he finished the operation?
"That's enough out of you."

What did the doctor say to the tonsil?
"You look so cute, I think I'll take you out. "

What did the farmer use to cure his sick hog?
Oinkment (ointment).

What did the nervous kid say when the doctor asked if he had been getting enough iron?
"Yes, I chew my nails every day."

What did the tooth say to the dentist?
"Fill 'er up!"

What did the woman say when the doctor asked if she smoked cigarettes?
"Of cough!"

What do cowboys call a doctor's hypodermic needle?
A sick (six) shooter.

What do seven days of dieting do?
They make one weak (week).

What do you call a person who doesn't have all his fingers on one hand?
Normal. Fingers are supposed to be on two hands.

What do you get if an ax hits your head?
A splitting headache.

Doctor, Health, & Medical Riddles

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