'You never get anything right,' complained the teacher. 'What kind of job do you think you'll get when you leave school ?'
'Well, I want to be the weather girl on TV.'

As he was walking along the street the minister saw a little girl trying to reach a high door knocker. Anxious to help, he went over to her. 'Let me do it, dear,' he said, rapping the knocker vigorously.
'Great,' said the little girl. 'Now run like hell !'

A fat girl went into a cafe and ordered two slices of apple pie with four scoops of ice cream cover with lashings of raspberry sauce and piles of chopped nuts.
'Would you like a cherry on the top ?' asked the waitress.
'No, thanks,' said the girl, 'I'm on a diet !'

Boy monster: You've got a face like a million dollars.
Girl monster: Have I really ?
Boy monster: Yes, its green and wrinkly !

Did you hear about the girl monster who wasn't pretty and wasn't ugly ?
She was pretty ugly

Did you hear about the Eskimo teacher who was reciting Little Jack Horner to her class of five year olds ? She'd got as far as 'Little Jack Horner sat in the corner' when one little girl put up her hand and said, 'Please, Miss, what's a corner ?'

What did one magician say to another ?
Who was that girl I saw you with last night ?

First cannibal: Who was that girl I saw you with last night ?
Second cannibal: That was no girl, that was my supper !

What did the Eskimo school boy say to the Eskimo school girl ?
What's an ice girl like you doing in a place like this ?

She's the kind of girl that boys look at twice - they can't believe it the first time.