How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub?
They both have rings!

What did the answering machine say to the telephone?
Take my word for it.

What did the fax machine say to the telephone?
You send me!

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?
Money's tight these days!

Why couldn't the skunk use her phone?
It was out of odor.

How does a cheerleader answer the phone?
H-E-L-L-O!

How does a lobster answer the phone?
Shello?

How does a door chime answer the phone?
Bella?

How can you tell if someone who's just had a perm is on the phone?
You get a frizzy signal!

How can you tell if someone who's having a temper tantrum is on the phone?
You get a tizzy signal!