housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger
standing on the doorstep. 'Excuse
me for disturbing you, ma'am,' he said politely, ' but I pass
your house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed
that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head
with a loaf of bread!' 'That's
day you wallop him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet
this morning you were hitting him with a chocolate cake....?' 'Well,
today is his birthday!'
irate woman burst into the baker's shop and said, ' I sent
my son in for two pounds of cookies this morning, but when
I weighed them there was only one pound. I suggest that you
check your scales.' The
baker looked at her calmly for a moment or two and then replied,
' Ma'am, I suggest you weigh your son.'
the carpenter's son a chip off the old block ?
! Doctor ! I think I'm going crazy. I have a carrot growing
out of my ear. Amazing
! so you have. How could that have happened ? I can't
understand it either, because I planted cabbage !
Why is your January report card so bad ? Son:
Well, you know how it is. Things are always marked down after
did Mr and Mrs Werewolf call their son Camera? Because
he was always snapping
and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger.
Will said,' Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's
the one who dug the hole for it.' Bill
wasn't impressed, ' Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead
Sea ? My father's the one who killed it !
Jimmy was having a snack after school with his Gran. ' Would
you like another cookie ?' she asked. 'Yes,
please,' replied Jimmy. 'What
good manners you have,' said his Gran. ' I do like to hear
young people say 'please' and 'thank you'.' 'I'll
say them both if I can have a big piece of that cake,' replied
whose son had just passed his driving test went home one evening
and found that the boy had driven slap bang into the living room
'How did you manage to do that ?' he fumed. 'Quite
simple, Dad. I came in through the kitchen and turned left
son is horribly spoiled,' a concerned lady said to a proud
mother one day. 'How
dare you !' she retorted. 'my son's a perfect little gentleman.' 'I'm
afraid you haven't seen what the steamrollers done to him