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Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games ?
So that they can pack the defence !
A manager was being interviewed after he had resigned from a football club ?
"Were the crowd not behind you" asked the reporter
"They were right behind me all right", said the manager, "But I managed to shake them off at the station !"
Why were the two managers sitting around sketching crockery before the start of the game ?
It was a cup draw !
Why was the struggling mange seen shaking the club cat ?
To see if there was any more money in the kitty !
Where do football directors go when they are fed up ?
The bored room !
Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight. What happened to your three week diet ?
Player: I finished it in three days !
Manager: Our new midfielder cost ten million. I call him our wonder player
Fan: Why's that ?
Manager: Everytime he plays I wonder why I bothered to buy him !
Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom ?
Captain: Well, it could have been worse.
Manager: How ?
Captain: There could have been more teams in the league !
Our team is doing so badly that "Manager of the Month" isn't an award
It's an appointment !
Manager: I'll give you fifty pounds a week to start with and a hundred pounds a week in a year's time ?
Young player: OK, I'll come back in a year's time !
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