I think
I'm spending too long on the Internet, I'm starting to get spots
in front of my eyes.
Have you seen an optician? No, just spots.
I use
the internet to tell me what the weather's like. How do you do that? I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's
raining!
I want
to explore the Internet, how much do your computers cost?
£500 a piece. And how much does a whole one cost?
Since
you've discovered the Internet, you don't pay any attention
to me!
Who said that?
So what
exactly can I learn on the Internet?
Anything you like - it can even teach you to talk like an Indian.
How? See? It's working already.
Teacher:
Don't forget to check the Internet if you have trouble with
your homework questions.
Pupil: It's not the questions I have trouble with, it's the
answers.
Teacher:
What are the four elements?
Pupil: Fire, Earth, Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet?
Pupil: Well, Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net, I'm in my
element.
We invisible
men hate the Internet!
Don't fib - I can see right through you!
What
do you call someone who spends 24 hours a day on the Internet?
Anything you like, they're not listening to you anyway.
Where
does the Internet football team play?
Webley.
