birthday jokes

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Judy: Is grape jelly very expensive?
Trudy: No.
Judy: Then why did the counsellor yell at me when I spilled a whole jar on Bob's new shirt?
Julie: What time is it?
Counsellor: Three o'clock.
Julie: Oh,no!
Counsellor: What's the matter?
Julie: I've been asking the time all day. And everybody gives me a different answer!
Marty came into his cabin with his clothes all torn. Norman asked him, 'Did you have an accident?'
'No,' said Marty. 'A bull threw me over a fence.'
'But that's an accident,' said Norman.
'No, it's not. The bull did it on purpose!' Marty insisted.
Mitch came into his cabin with holes cut all over his shirt.
'What's happened?' asked Nancy.
'We were playing cat and mouse. And I was the swiss cheese!'
Mother: Did you win a prize for horseback riding?
Son: No, I didn't. Only horrible mention.
New camper: I thought you said this camp has no mosquitoes.
Old camper: That's right. These mosquitoes come from the camp down the road!
On the last day of camp everyone was asked the same question: 'What is the best part of the camp?'
One wise guy answered, 'Going home!'
One day the counsellor got a phone call. It was from a camper who had been at camp the summer before. The old camper said, 'I thought of camp yesterday.'
'Why?' the counsellor asked. 'Where were you?'
'At the garbage dump!' the old camper answered.
One day, Steve's baseball cap was missing. He said that Ron had taken it.
The counsellor asked Ron, 'Did you take Steve's cap?'
'Absolutely, positively not!' insisted Ron.
'OK, I believe you,' said the Counsellor
'In that case,' said Ron, 'can I keep the cap?'
Penny's mother sent her some new sneakers. When they arrived at camp, Penny tried to put them on. 'Ouch!' she cried. 'These sneakers hurt!'
Cathy was watching from the next bunk. 'Of course they hurt. You put them on the wrong feet!'
Penny thought for a moment. 'But these are the only feet I have,' she answered.
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