Glenn: Kathy, Mum says to run across the street and see how old Mrs Planter is.
Kathy: OK
Mum (to Kathy): Well, what did she say ?
Kathy: She says it's none of your business how old she is.

Dad: Katie, why is your January report card so bad ?
Katie: You know how it is, Dad. Things are always marked down after Christmas.

Nikki: I bet I can make you say 'black.' What are the colours of the flag?
Mother: Red, white and blue.
Nikki: I told you I could make you say 'black.'
Mother: I didn't say 'black.'

Mrs Johnston, your daughter would be a fine dancer except for two things.
What are they ?
Her feet.

It was getting close to Christmas and the mother asked her ten year old daughter what she would like as a gift.
'A mirror mummy,' came the reply.
'My goodness, why ?'
'Because,' sighed the daughter, 'I'm getting too big to make up in the doorknob.'

'Mum,' Jenny yelled from the kitchen, 'you know that dish you were always worried I'd break?'
'Yes dear. What about it ?'
'Well your worries are over.'

Father: Doctor, come quick! My girl just swallowed our pocket size TV !
Doctor: I'll be right over. What are you doing in the meantime ?
Father: I don't know. I guess we'll have to listen to the radio.

Mother: Don't be selfish. Let your sister use the sled half the time.
Daughter: I do, Mum. I use it going down the hill and she gets to use it coming up.

Little Jackie fell off her bicycle and cut her knee. Her mother bathed and dressed the wound, and then gave the girl a pill to soothe her. After she swallowed it, Jackie asked, 'How will the pill know which leg to go down ?'

Amy: I'm so glad I'm not a bird.
Father: Why?
Amy: I can't fly.