There once was a kid named Darren
whose room was surprisingly barren.
He had no toys
like all normal boys,
but he did believe in sharing.

A cannibal known as Ned
ate potatoe chips in his bed.
His mother said, 'Sonny,
it's not very funny.
Why don't you eat people instead ?'.

There once was a writer named Wright
who instructed his son to write right.
He said, 'son' write Wright right.
It's not right to write Wright as 'rite' -
try to write Wright all right !'

There once was a consumer named Phil
who really wanted to kill.
A sly yound vendor
who made him a big spender
and gave him a very large bill.

There once was a boy from Brazil
who of pumpkin ate more than his fill.
He thought it no matter,
that he grew fatter and fatter,
but he burst - which makes me quite ill.

There once was a guy named Matt
who had an overly large cat.
When it chased a mouse
it shook the whole house,
so Matt got rid of the cat.

There was an old man of Philly
who was hooked on the movie 'Free Willy.'
He quit his job at the jail,
for a dolphin and whale
and so was the life of wee willy.

There was a young fellow called Jake
who had a poisonous snake.
It bit his head
and now he's dead,
so that was the end of Jake.

There once was a boy from Montreal
who loved to play basketball.
For a team he tried out,
but if he made it, I doubt
for you see, he was three feet tall.

There was a young man named Wyatt
whose voice was exceedingly quiet,
and then one day if faded away.