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Back a page Centipede Jokes Forward a page
What goes 99-clonk, 99-clonk, 99-clonk ?
A centipede with a wooden leg !
Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team ?
He took too long to put his boots on !
What is worse than an alligator with toothache ?
A centipede with athlete's foot !
What do you get if you cross a centipede and a parrot ?
A walkie talkie !
What is worse than a giraffe with a sore throat ?
A centipede with chilblains !
What has 50 legs but cant walk ?
Half a centipede !
What do you call a guard with 100 legs ?
A sentrypede !
Why was the centipede late ?
Because he was playing "This little Piggy" with his baby brother !
What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken ?
Enough drumsticks to feed an army !
What did one centipede say to the other centipede ?
You've got a lovely pair of legs, You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs ....!
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