Goldilocks And The Three Bears Jokes |
What do you say when the three bears want to sit down?
Three chairs for the Three Bears! |
What gave Goldilocks a troubled night's sleep?
Night-bears! |
What made Goldilocks shiver?
Quaker Oats! |
What steps do you take when a bear is chasing you?
Very big ones! |
What's brown and hairy and can see just as well from either end?
A bear with its eyes shut! |
What's brown, furry and has twelve paws?
The Three Bears! |
What's the difference between Mummy Bear's porridge, Daddy Bear's porridge and Baby Bear's porridge?
Well, one is Mummy Bear's, one is Daddy Bear's, and one is Baby Bear's! |
When Goldilocks spilt the milk, how did she mop it up?
She used a sponge-cake! |
Where did Goldilocks fall asleep?
At the Three Bores house! |
Which is the scariest fairy-tale?
Ghouldilocks and the Three Brrrrs! |
Why did Goldilocks stir the porridge so vigorously?
Because Daddy Bear came in and told her to beat it! |
Why wasn't Mummy Bear's porridge warm enough?
Because it was yesterday's! |
Why weren't the porridge bowls round?
Because porridge is a square meal! |
After the woodcutter chops a pile of logs, what happens to them at night?
They sleep like humans! |
How many conkers grow on the average fir-tree?
None . . . conkers grow on horse-chestnut trees! |
Which is the oldest tree in the forest?
The elder |
What did the woodcutter's wife say to her husband in December?
Not many chopping days left until Christmas! |
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