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Why do golfers carry a spare sock ?
Because they might get a hole in one !
What book do you buy to teach children how to fight ?
A scrap book !
What sort of animals make the best TV presenters ?
Gnus - readers !
What sort of animal is best at getting up in the morning ?
A Llama clock !
I hear you have just invented gunpowder ?
Yes, I was using some candles to light my laboratory and it came to me in a flash !
How is your other invention coming along - you know, the matches ?
Oh, they've been a striking success !
Why did the doctor take his nose to pieces ?
He wanted to see what made it run !
Why is it dangerous to tell jokes to Humpty Dumpty ?
He might crack up !
Why do pens get sent to prison ?
To do long sentences !
What was the parrot doing in prison ?
It was a jail-bird !
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